Sunday, 6 March 2011

Nearly Four Months On and You Can Still Hurt Me...

Its a georgous day outside, the sun is shining and summer is on its way, what more can you want on a glorious sunday.
I had a bit of late night last night (or early morning if you want to call it that). I got to bed at 8 in the morning after been out with friends to have a good dance and giggle on a saturday night. After a few hours sleep I woke and had a look through all last nights pictures on my camera. We seemed to get a bit camera happy when we was in the car. Lots of random pictures.
I told my friend I would give her my cameras memory card so she can put the pictures onto her computer. So I decided to delete a lot of old pictures that I never got to deleting in the past. There were ones of me and my ex on holiday and I thought it was about time they got deleted. Thats my past and I don't to need to have them pictures on camera anymore. I have the pictures on my computer so if I do ever want to look back on past in the future then I still can. As I was deleting pictures I came across some pictures I hadn't seen before. They were from a night out my ex went on the week before we broke up. As I was looking at the pictures, I recognised a girl within the pictures... It was the girl I found in my bed the following week.
So not only did my ex cheat on me, he used my camera to take pictures of them together. I wouldn't have the cheek to do that and don't know how he did. Its extremely in sensitive... did he think I wasn't ever going to see them?!?!
This was the 1st time since the day I found him in bed with her girl, that I actually cried. Its been nearly 4 months and I thought I was over it. I then got upset with myself for letting him still effect me like this. After a long cry in bed and lots of texts to my good friend. I realised it was a beautiful day out and I wasn't going to waste it in bed by myself. So I got up, swung the curtains open and let the glorious sun into the house.
I put my music on loud and had a dance around my room while I got dressed for the day ahead. I really enjoyed myself and am happy again and am not letting them pictures affect me anymore :)
I uploaded last nights pictures to the computer and had a laugh at them.
I love it when the sun is out because it makes everything better. Thing just seems so much prettier and you get that feeling that things are going to be ok. I have spent the day with my family and we are just waiting for our dinner to finish cooking and all tuck into some lovely food.

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