Follow Your Dreams...

Sorry I haven't blogged for a while I have been trying to figure a few things out with life. I am now on TWITTER at @FaithLoveHopeG.

It can be hard to be happy and content with what you have sometimes in life. As a child I had this dream of my perfect job, my perfect house and my perfect partner. I have the perfect job and the perfect house, just not the partner. I am happy without the boyfriend though as I don't currently want one or need one to make my life happy. I found with my last partner that he held me back from things I wanted to do in life and now I don't have anyone to please other than myself and I love that.
I know I should be happy with everything I have, as most people work a life time to have the things I have but theres something missing. I have achieved my goal and dream but unfortunately I now don't feel happy with it all, as I now don't know what am living for. I love my friends and family so much but I don't think this life is what I want anymore. I know that it will upset so many people if I just pack up my life and leave to see what else is out there in the world but I really want to go travelling.
I worked hard for everything I have and I think one of the reasons I am disappointmented with it is because the one person I really wanted to be proud of me was my Ex, and he was never able to be as he was jealous of what I had achieved while he was unable to even start working on his dreams. I know I shouldn't let his opinion still bug me but its hard when you know that someone out there recents you for achieving your dream.
I now have a new dream... I am going to sell the life I currently have now and go travelling. Then when I get back (if I do come back) I will create the dream I currently have and get back to this life but in the future I will also have the husband and children I dream of.
If something isn't right in life change it. Follow your dreams...

Can't Get You Out Of My Head

Ever since I met that guy I mentioned in my last blog, I haven't been able to stop thinking about him. Everything I see around me and on tv reminds me of him and makes me think of him. It's so strange, I haven't felt like this in ages. Although I have been unable to stop thinking of him, I still haven't got round to texting him and asking him when he's free to meet again.
Am starting to think the reason that I am so useless at messaging potential boyfriends back is because deep down I am scared of getting hurt. I just never realised until I met that certain someone. Well I need to take my own advise and arrange to meet him. What's the worst that will happen.... He might so NO so what its not going to kill me. Right am going to text him.. Wish me luck :)

Love: you can get you heart broken or live the greatest love story with world has ever known but you will never know if you don't try.

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Lots Of New Potential Boyfriends

I havent been about to blog since my last blog as you can tell from the title I have met a few potential boyfriends. When I say I've met a few guys I mean 10 guys in total. Am suprised myself at how many guys are interested in me. I don't think I have ever had this many guys all at the same time. Maybe I've turned from the ugly duckling until the beautiful swan.
Even though I do have a lot of guys interested in me, it doesn't mean am interested in all of them. Infact I only actually like one of them and see myself been with someone like him in the future. I have always said to my friends that when I meet the right guy I will know instantly and I did know from the second I saw him. We had grown up together as children and when we got older we both got on with our own lives. We recently bumped into each other in the pub and have been in contact since. I think this guy definately has potential to be my future boyfriend.
Am not wanting to settle down with just one person though at the moment and (lets call him adam) adam is currently living a couple of hours away but will eventually be moving back to my town when he has completed his studying. For me this a great opportunity, I have someone that see myself maybe spending my life with but before we settle down we both to get have fun and live our lives how we want for another couple of years.
I am also talking to the other 9 guys as I dont want to rule anyone out just yet. I need to go out and have fun and met other guys so that when I do settle down I know its with the right person and that I made the right decision been with them. I don't want to settle down too young and then live my life thinking 'but what if I'd met someone else'. I know quite a few people that settled down young and they have grown to resent there partner as they feel like their missing out on life. It has also lead to many affairs some of which their partners have found out about and the only reason they stay together is because of houses and children they have together. To me this is how life should be, I know life isn't a fairy tale but staying with someone because its the safe option and would be completed to split up is not the way life should be. I felt like that with my ex, I thought it would be completed to leave him and everyone would hate me for messing things up but it turns out everyone supported me as know one wanted to see me spend my life with someone I didnt know anymore.
So by putting myself out there and having a good time I have a met lets of new guys. Its all about enjoying yourself and been happy then the rest falls into place easier.

New Guy Now Old

Well I met a new guy. He seemed so nice it was untrue, he was caring and thoughtful and new what a girl wanted. It was a dream come true. We went out for food and drinks many times and chatted away. The conversation flowed easy and we laughed away.
I was finally happy and was starting to see myself with someone else and a future together. He text always going on about seeing me again and that he looked forward to it. He said he hadnt been with someone in a while and mentioned that it had always been on and off with his ex but it hadn't been on in ages.
Well today I found out everything he said had been a lie. He completely played me. The girl he mentioned as his ex isn't his ex, she is infact his girlfriend of 7 years. So in the last 5months I have been the girl that was cheated on and now I have also been the other girl. I just feel cheated out of love again.
Hopefully I have kissed enough frogs now so next time I will meet Prince Charming.

Another Weekend...

This has been another eventful weekend. I was out on Friday as I usually am. I can normally been found in my local pubs on Fridays. Well I had said I wasn't going to drink on Friday as I work on Saturdays. This I changed my mind when I got out, well it wasn't all my chose. I was bought a drink when I got the 1st pub and then when I arrived at the second my friend had bought me a bottle of wine. It was a great night. I was introduced to a guy and we have been talking since. So watch this space...
I was out in the city on Saturday night with the girls for a friends birthday. As normal we all got ready at one house and had a few drinks before we went out. It was a fab night, we totally danced the night away. We were all so busy dancing that we didn't even drink when we was out. You don't need to drink lots when your out, its all about who your with and having a good time.
I would like to the wonderful friends and people I met this weekend for making it a weekend to remember. Love ya all x

Mistake...

I need to take some time for myself and figure out what am wanting in life and what am looking for. There is no point in dating and then getting involved in a relationship if its not what I want and if am not going to be around long.
I just don't want to make the same mistake again like I did with my ex. My dad says am too nice and trusting and that scares me that I could just get walked over all over again. I didn't have a clue what was happening and going on behind my back because I didn't think I had to reason not to trust him.
I don't want to make another mistake and rush into things too fast. I want to go into a relationship thinking it might last, I don't see the point in entering a relationship thinking 'its only a matter of time before it ends'. I don't be alone but am not going to rush into anything. I don't want to make another stupid mistake and end up in pointless and meaningless relationship, its not worth the heartache.
I can't complain too much about whats happened because if I did that would be like saying 'I don't like the life I have now'. I love the life I have now and I know for a fact I wouldn't have the things in it if I had never not get involved with him. I wouldn't change my life for anything. I love it and I love the people in it.

Have a listen to this song below, its a few years old but I like it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJCGgWEo6aQ

I SCREAM...

SCREAMING is a great wait to release emotions inside you. I like screaming for no reason, it makes me feel alive. Just try it, Scream as loud as you can and just let it all out. Don't you feel good for doing that?!?!